The robo-battle we know you’ve been waiting for!  In this corner, the mighty Ultron!  Strong enough to take on Thor, Iron Man, Captain America, Hulk and the other Avengers at once - this is one badass robo-capo.  And the far corner, WALL·E!  A "Waste Allocation Load Lifter Earth-Class" robot, WALL·E holds Earth's garbage-apocalypse title of “Last Robot Standing”. For these two metal marauders, exact weight and reach are unknown, but clearly in favor of Tony Stark and Bruce Banner’s inadvertent creation. How do you measure the total of a countless number of Ultron robots? But no matter, WALL·E is not likely to go toe-to-toe with Ultron anyway (WALL·E has no feet, never mind toes).

Ultron's powers consist of super strength and speed, near invulnerability and self-repair, flight and an onboard armory of constantly upgradable weapons. He is also a genius strategist, who can transmit copies of himself into an endless number of computers and robots.  

(If only the Avengers had called WALL·E?) 

WALL·E, while far from invulnerable, is also handy at self-repair (though it may take him longer than Utron to find the right part). WALL·E is no genius, but unlike Ultron, he has the emotional intelligence of a worker who has faithfully punched the clock at the same job for 700 years (very impressive on a resume). WALL-E is a romantic, with the soul of an artist. (Ultron has the soul of a sociopathic jerk.)


(Trivia alert: Pixar's "Luxo" lamp used in WALL·E's sculpture.)

While WALL·E can't control other robots, he does have a pet roach, HAL who has WALL·E's back for sure.  

The excessively more powerful, brilliant and ruthless Ultron should easily win a fight with WALL·E, smashing him into bits (and bytes) within seconds.  

But that's not the way it's going to go down. At the end of the day, WALL·E is a lovely, resilient and compassionate fella, with doleful eyes that could melt any human's heart. WALL·E has won over more powerful robots before. It's not a matter of super strength, cunning or advanced weaponry; with WALL·E, love will conquer all.


(Go ahead Ultron, take WALL·E's hand. You'll feel better.)